Spotify will come in handy for those of you looking for follow a few links to some music you might like

So I was on spotify listening to a few old favourites of mine and I happened to search for Kings of Leon. To my surprise, their top tracks appeared as: Use Somebody, Sex on Fire, Closer, Manhattan and Revelry. I was Gobsmacked! What happened to their old favourites like Molly’s Chambers and The Bucket? Diminished into obscurity by the black-wave of newcomers to their newer more approachable album. Whats more, their beautiful lovely first album has absolutely ZERO Ratings!

It was being lorded all over the radio as something beautiful.

It sounded as if the djs waving the banner for this track were desperately trying to out themselves as people whose musical interest is deeper than a shallow drying puddle.

Brought on by Portishead’s cult status and not by the quality of the track

I came across Kings of Leon quite late into their career, not following the advice of friends when their first album was released, I came across them as they released Because of The Times after hearing Knocked Up playing on the jukebox in my student union. It was un-ignorable and I was on Itunes as soon as I got home that night, totally hooked.

I loved it all, but I could NOT put down Youth and Young Manhood their first album. Like a gushing teenager I said things like “If I had to listen to one album for the rest of my life, it would be this one!” – A statement I still maintain. It made me want to pick up my guitar and learn it all over again, forgetting how gnarled and musically impotent my keyboard and console-game ruined fingers are.

Youth and Young Manhood was Loud, Abrasive, Fun, Young and Vital and though critics are now claiming that KoL have come into “musical maturity” and that “this is their most technically proficient album to date” what does that count for if the personality is gone?

1: Chicane

Whats their latest called? Poppihola?

Excuse me if this is not a blatant case of coat-tail riding. Taking a wonderful (if a little overused by the BBC) piece of music by Sigur Rós and lacing it through with your trademarked tired and droll ambient swells does nothing but drag the original through the dirt. It got you back on the radio and perhaps caused a few nostalgic fans – pining for their late 90’s Ibiza holidays – to shuffle out the door and buy a copy, but what are you really doing in 2009 with the same old material?

2: Portishead

I quite liked Portishead, people will recognise them for tracks like Glory Box and Wandering Star but they’re one of those funny bands that – though great – didn’t motivate too many people to snap up and listen to, unlike their contemporaries; Massive Attack.

A year back, Machine Gun, their latest single was released and this one went right over my head. It was being lorded all over the radio as something beautiful.

It sounded as if the djs waving the banner for this track were desperately trying to out themselves as people whose musical interest is deeper than a shallow drying puddle. Brought on by Portishead’s cult status and not by the quality of the track which is toss.

3: Kings of Leon

I don’t mean to pick on you guys because I think your the victims of a failed relationship. Back when you were recording Youth and Young Manhood and Aha Shake Heartbreak your label must have resembled some kind of rakish, leggy crane of a woman. A lilt to her accent and a smile full of intrigue and promise. Telling you that she loves your music and your creativity and she’d never ask you to compromise. You had some happy times together, she let you into the kind of world you always wanted to be a part of.

Only now, that leggy lady has turned haggard and emphysemic. Cheroot smoke has stained her platinum blonde hair the colour of urine. You think she somehow resembles Hulk Hogan. You’re resigned to the fact your only producing music to fund her shallow life of shopping, cocktails and glamour – as if fashion, arrogance and money (or the illusion of) can somehow compensate being born with a crippling lack of personality or soul. You now start to think your being kept close as an organ donor for failing lungs, kidney, liver and heart.

You were having so much fun guys, I hope you still are even if I can’t hear it.

4: Take That

I listened to them when I was a tot, as well as the Backstreet Boys and East 17. Loved a bit of it to be honest. But I don’t know how to explain how I feel about Take That’s comeback.

It kind of feels like that track from Team America World Police Freedom isn’t Free. A total parody of misty eyed American Patriotism and a punch in the face for people who are comforted by it.

Take That seem to have come back releasing the right songs for the right market, but they’re so gushy and clumsily cobbled together. Surprising seeing as Gary Barlow is lorded is one of the best songwriters on the Island.

Somebody should tell him that less is more, bands like Radiohead, Cherry Ghost, Fleet Foxes (what a fantastic track by the way) and Iron & Wine could teach him a thing or two about the art of understatement.

5: Chris De Burgh

I know the parents and the family love him, but we really aren’t obliged too.
He really is exactly the kind of person who’d release an album and call it Footsteps.

What did he do this for??

I know I’m a grumpy git and I’m dreadfully sorry if I upset anybody, feel free to leave a scrawl on my comments